Thursday, November 6, 2008

Obama Catches On

Well folks, it's been a long election season and this entire time we've just wanted to spread the good word: that John McCain is a robot. 

The campaign is now over and it looks like the humans have trumped the androids.

While Obama's win makes us elated, it's this video, released just before the election, that really makes us smile. 

The Democrats finally caught on and that's what this whole thing was really about.

Mission Accomplished!! (and not in the George W. Bush kind of way).

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

Fuck Yeah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

For The Masochist Within

Cause it hurts so good....

Indulge your inner paranoid masochist with the Slate compilation "Voting Problems, So Far" and read about how black panthers were blocking one Philadelphia polling places with night sticks (that can't be too comforting for Joe the Rural White Idiot), how the Secretary of State of Colorado tried to erase 20,000 names from the voter list (douchebag), and how in one county in New York, the name "Barack Osama" appeared on the ballot (oops!).

A 7 hour wait in Virginia's 32nd precinct? It'll be a long one....

Monday, November 3, 2008

The Face of the Undecided Voter

"Undecided voter"- a euphemism for "stupid person". If you're thinking I just did a Google image search for an ugly dude with a totally vacant expression, you would be wrong.

How wrong? Front page story on wrong. He literally is the face of "undecided voters" everywhere.

I'm Freaking Out Man

Do you find yourself unable to sit still? Do you refresh your New York Time's electoral map too many times during the day? Are you compulsively checking the National Review just in case they break some major story about how Barack Obama raped a 9 year old white girl yesterday?

It's not often that I am kept up at night reading about the intricacies of the multi-generational Cuban-American vote in the Miami-Dade county of Florida, so I can empathize.

So without further ado, the JMCR Rx list for election anxiety, to help get you through these final 30 hours.

1) Watch a funny movie, I like "Super Troopers", but whatever floats your boat.

2) Listen to an entire kickass album. Some good picks could be "Another Side of Bob Dylan" or "Dear Catastrophe Waitress"

3) Read JMCR....but like older posts, ya know? Take a trip down memory lane, when McCain-ical was just the "presumptive nominee" and no one had ever heard of Sarah Palin (oh such carefree days!)

4) Plan a va-cay! Friends in Argentina? Figure out a way to go. Been meaning to get on the Birthright bandwagon? Check-it out. Be the change you wish to see in the world. Riiight?

So its a pretty basic list, but my how those things pass the time.

30 more hours to go...... I would normally make some sort of reference to "I Wanna Be Sedated"...if only in a bizarre twist of fate The Ramones hadn't endorsed McCain-ical.

Saturday, November 1, 2008

Case Closed

I've always wondered what a robot sucking the life force from a baby would look like.