Friday, February 29, 2008

I'll Be Back

Remember the last time a foreign-born public official wanted to become president? Ah yes, the emotionless cyborg assassin known as Arnold Schwarzenegger. Now we have septuagenarian senator John McCain. One played the most famous robot in history, the other may actually be the most famous robot in history. Coincidence? I think not.

Panama: Ruining the aspirations of would-be presidents since 2008

It has come to the attention of JohnMcCainIsARobot that J-tron might not even be eligible due to some pesky rule about being a natural born citizen and all (which we should all be thanking our lucky stars for, lest the Terminator decide to run).

It seems as though it would make more sense for him to be disqualified for being a robot than for being born on an army base in Panama, but how could the Founding Fathers have known that this sort of technology would exist.....

A constitutional ammendment banning robots? I don't know...

Wednesday, February 27, 2008


Ever since John Mellencamp pledged his jam "Our Country" to another John (Edwards), John McCain has been sans campaign song. Well we here at JohnMcCainIsARobot say screw those losers, you can do better. Not just a campaign song, but a campaign music group...specifically French techno duo Daft Punk. These guys actually dress up like robots! There are numerous songs the McCain camp can use, goodies like: Technologic, Digital Love, and my personal fave Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger. And if J-tron isn't into the French thang, there's always Styx's Mr. Roboto.

Someone's getting an upgrade!

The new model. We can make him faster, stronger, better than he was before....

This Just In...Cindy McCain is also an android

The first little gem is courtesy of Meghan McCain's blog:

The Proof is Overwhelming

How does McCain keep keepin' on? Mystery solved.

Old Glory Insurance aka Barack Obama

Why are we so concerned with the potential robot-ness of John McCain? Here's why:

You read it here 2nd

Further proof:

David Brooks once wrote "And I can tell you there is nobody in politics remotely like him"

If that doesn't scream robot, I don't know what does.

The Iseman Cometh

McCain sure has a type...maybe he's pre-programmed to like waspy blondes with TERRIBLE eyebrows.

Tuesday, February 26, 2008

And For My First Post....

....I will spell the subject's name incorrectly (see the first line of the post below).

Stay tuned for other blunders and for an exciting year of proving that all of our worst fears are true....that John McCain is in fact, a robot.


This blog is dedicated to pursuing the theory that Johm McCain is actually a robot controlled by Karl Rove.

This nascent theory is mostly due to his crypt-defying age, the yellowed decay of his teeth, and the punctuated monotone phrases he blurts out that constitute his speeches.

Admittedly, there is not a lot of hard evidence to back up my robotic hypothesis. It is in the spirit of civic duty and scientific exploration that I have established this blog to act as a forum for discussing and researching this important issue that will no doubt affect all Americans.