Both Sides Now

FDR didn't save the Jews. Bob Dylan was really mean to Joan Baez. Great men (and women) can sometimes do really crappy things. Likewise, some over-the-hill robots who have an extremely poor grasp on current economic and foreign policy issues can sometimes be loyal and compassionate.

Who's biased now?

JMCR Will Give You $5 If You Can Sit Through This Entire Ad

Good, but next time with more robot.

So Old He Uses The Word "Trollop"

This may be the best news we've ever received here at JMCR.

John McCain called Cindy McCain a cunt!

Wonkette tells us that Cliff Schecter's new book, The Real McCain, recalls an incident where McCain just done lost his shit.

Three reporters from Arizona, on the condition of anonymity, also let me in on another incident involving McCain's intemperateness. In his 1992 Senate bid, McCain was joined on the campaign trail by his wife, Cindy, as well as campaign aide Doug Cole and consultant Wes Gullett. At one point, Cindy playfully twirled McCain's hair and said, "You're getting a little thin up there." McCain's face reddened, and he responded, "At least I don't plaster on the makeup like a trollop, you cunt." McCain's excuse was that it had been a long day. If elected president of the United States, McCain would have many long days.

Cindy doesn't realize how hard it is to grow hair when you're made of metal.

Things That Are False

"As for Basra," Mr. McCain told Joe Klein of Time in January that it was “not a problem.” He told John King of CNN while in Baghdad last month that Mr. Sadr’s “influence has been on the wane for a long time.”

Au contraire mon petite robot...

Met(ic)al Records

Oh Hell Yes.

The NYT tells us that McCainical will be releasing his medical records from 2000 to 2008.

I can see it now...

Software upgrade: $20 co-pay
General body tune-up: $300
Trip to the emergency room for a short circuit: $100
Vicodin ingestion necessitated a system reboot after accidentally eating Cindy's breakfast: $1000

That Senate healthcare package sure is extensive.

I'm Totes Voting For J. M.

Heidi Montag is voting for John McCain. Given her affinity for robots (Spencer), I do not find this information surprising.

What I am surprised by is John McCain's response: "I'm honored to have Heidi's support, and I want to assure her that I never miss an episode of 'The Hills,' especially since the new season started".

He's really got his pulse on the youth. Next up, John McCain will address voters from his table at Les Deux.

At least this means LC will have to vote Democrat.

Sore Losers

If your candidate loses the primary, for the love of God/Allah/Adonai/a goat/Vishnu/John Coltrane, please do not vote for John McCain.

There is no such thing as a McCain Democrat...those people are called assholes.

This has been a public service announcement brought to you by JMCR.